Today's news and jokes
3 hours ago
johnny depp and charlotte gainsbourg
i had no idea this film actually existed... it's called Ils se marièrent et eurent beaucoup d'enfants... and they lived happily ever after... might have to track this down as i like both these folks...
death star
this is quite a cool effort on a death star costume but he's really let himself down with the jeans etc... i would have worn ummmm maybe black tights and a stocking over my head so if it was dark and you wear standing outside maybe on the edge of a balcony, it would look like the death star is floating in space over the alderaan system...
give me an excuse to wear tights and i'll take it...
it could be good...
and it could be bad... get him to the greek... i'm betting it will actually be quite good... it can't be all bad with that cast... russell brand is such a big star now and that has got to be a good thing 'cause he's fucking great...
picture of the day
this is a photo of something of that i would both love to do and then at the same time be scared shitless of doing at all... i love great whites and i'd love to see one swim past me and see that fin moving through the water... it gives me goose bumps thinking about it... but i would also be filled with fear because these fishy's can jump...
lily allen
among all of those plastic girly pop stars out there, lily allen stands head and shoulders above them all with her brilliant lyrics and great melodies... awwwwwwwww and shes quite cute... 'not fair' is a great song... you gotta love this girl... i'd rather go ga ga over her than ga ga over ga ga...
f@#k, s@#t, c@#t!!!!
the sopranos, uncensored. from victor solomon on Vimeo.
this is pretty funny and very long... i know people who talk like this all the time aswell... man, i miss tony soprano...
be here to love me
Margaret Browns film about the life of Townes Van Zandt, arguably Americas greatest cult singer songwriter, is quite simply the best music documentary I have ever seen. But not because it’s well filmed with some amazingly shot live footage of the man himself playing his music in his prime, or because it includes a whole bunch of soulless celebrity interview footage. This film pulls you in after the first few frames because it cuts you like a knife, giving you a deep insight into a self proclaimed hopeless case who made the decision early on that if he was to follow a life of rock’n’roll excess, family and love would always come secondary to his music. Not that Van Zandt ever once comes across like a rock star in the film, and like my now second favourite music documentary of all time, The Devil & Daniel Johnston, he comes across as a man simply overcome by the sadness of life, but with a true gift of writing the perfect song about that sadness and then singing it with a voice that carries straight to the deepest part of your soul.
Van Zandt was given shock treatment in his 20’s after he had thrown himself off a balcony “to see what it felt like”, thus wiping out most of his childhood memories forever. This tragic fact is most is likely the reason he found it so hard to connect with people except, maybe somewhat unwittingly, through writing songs and playing his music. Friends and fans such as Kris Kristofferson and Steve Earle appear in the film to tell gut wrenching stories of the many sides of Van Zandt, with one of Earle’s being the most telling of how deeply troubled the man was when he pulled out a gun and played russian roulette as Earle could only watch on helplessly in sheer horror.
In his later years Van Zandt seemed to try to connect more with his family and his children from different wives, but sadly his youngest son was the one to discover his fathers dead body after Townes finally sucumed to years of toxic abuse in 1997. With some amazing archival footage including a beautiful performance of his song ‘Waiting Around to Die’ shot in the trailer park where he was living at the time, where he quite literally brings an old friend to tears, this film tells the true story of a man who knew he was doomed from the start and wrote musical poetry about it, and in the tradition of that great mythic unappreciated artist, only in his eventual death from too much hard living, did he finally get his dues. Seek this film out as though your life depended on it.
perry farrell and some kids
this is pretty cool... perry farrell, one of the greatest rock singers ever, with a bunch of kids at a paul frank store... i think it is so cool when you see kids getting exposed to this sort of greatness at a young age... there should be more kids rock shows around and about the place... not every kids is just going to like the wiggles you know... i'm not dissing the wiggles though as i am a fan... they have not been the same since greg left the group... he was the yellow wiggle... it's pretty tough for any band to come back from losing their lead singer...
LOST simpsons
i'm not sure that this is "official" but it's pretty cool... the thing that's always amazed me about the simpsons is how they can make those special celebrity guests look so much like the person they are meant to be...
goth fest
every year there is a gothic festival in leipzig in germany and all the goths come out in the sunshine to play... i'm sure they are torn as to weather they would like it to rain or not... rain is far more gothic and gloomy but then it would wash all you makeup off so i guess sunlight for one day would be okay... gotta love a good bit of goth...
check out some more images here...
this is f@#ked
there's nothing you can really say about this environmental catastrophe... it's totally fukked... another nail in the coffin of our future generations... if i didn't need to get to work and the public transport in auckland wasn't so shithouse, i wouldn't drive a car, but i can tell you one thing i won't be buying as much as a packet of chewing gum from a BP store anymore...
don logan does ads
these are so weird and great... why they got ben kingsleys character don logan from sexy beast to do these ads i have no idea but i'm glad they did...
weird and interesting
this is a photo of the first ever nuclear explosion... evidently... the trinity explosion... it looks pretty bloody weird to me... i hope i never see this in real life... i spent most of my childhood in the 80's in fear of a nuclear attack... or in fear the the russians would attack... like that first scene in that movie red dawn where the kids are in class then all of a sudden all the russian soldiers start dropping outside the window in their parachutes... i totally believed that was going to happen... thanks a lot hollywood for runining an otherwise perfect childhood...
if norman bates was a real guy...
... then this would be his favorite website...
as an animal love this is pretty fucking disturbing actually but you kinda just keep looking... people are sick and one day the animals will rise up and go "this is for all our stuffed brothers and sisters"...
sergey tyukanov
this guy is pretty amazing... i just happened to stumble across his work while seaching for puratory... check out his website... weird backing music though...
you shouldn't laugh...
but this guy is so cute... at just 2ft 9in, indian muscleman aditya 'romeo' dev is the world's smallest bodybuilder... i bloody love him...
hows the weather where you are, mr lynch?
fuck i love david lynch... it's a shame you have to pay to get into his website but i'm sure it's worth it... it is free to get his daily weather report though... check it out here...
oh jeez...
i was watching the mini series the pacific last night... it was a great show, but as i was watching last night's final episode my mind got stuck on who was playing john leckie's mother... turns out it was the mom off 8 is enough, betty buckley, that tv show from the 80's or whenever the hell that show was on...
it's like when you are watching an animated film and you recognise a voice but you don't know who it is and it drives you nuts until the final credits, basically ruining the whole film experience... how or why the f@#k i kept the image of the mom from 8 is enough in my head for all these years and i can't remember some people in my families birthday is beyond me... i mean i never even really liked that show for f@#ks sake...
it's one of life's great mysteries...
cannes kinski
i have no idea what he is saying but whatever it is, he belives it...
and then he loses it...
terence hill & bud spencer
does anyone remember these guys? man, they just popped into my head... i used to love their movies... it looks like they are fighting the village people in this clip here though... why did these guys never make and asterix and obelisk movie i wonder? that would have been great...
my top 5 movie nutters
in no real order actually... nic cage is in there for most stuff before con air... he's been slightly off track since leaving las vegas... he's greeeeeeat in kick ass though with his adam west impersonation!!! christian bale is in there for american psycho and he was also a great nutter in harsh times... and the others, well they are mostly kooky in anything that they do...
1. nicolas cage
2. christopher walker
3. crispin glover
3. jack nicholson
4. christian bale
1. nicolas cage
2. christopher walker
3. crispin glover
3. jack nicholson
4. christian bale
muscleman, meet musclelady
awwww ze big muscle man looks ze vittle bit lonelys... someone should introduces him to ze nice little muscle lady... zey could put ze baby oil on each ozzers...
worst tan ever
now i've had some shitty sunburns in my time but i've never had one this bad... i have no idea why this guy is still smiling because this has gotta hurt like a motherfucker... and he's gonna peel like a mandarin...
i once burnt the shit out of my face with my sisters 1970's, dangerous as hell, tanning lamp... embarrassing but true... i thought i'd look good with a tan... mid-winter in dunedin... i stayed in front of it a little too long and fried my fucking face off... the next day i had to go to work and too embarrassed to fess up to the truth, i just said i had been out in the sun all day... even when there was no sun... they sent me home because my skin was falling off by about 10:30am... i went home and had the next day off... that night david grey started shooting people in aramoana and the next day i sat up in bed, and with my face in total meltdown mode, i watched all day as the events unfolded... it was a pretty insane day and a dark day in dunedin's history, made only slightly funny by the fact that i was nursing the worst sun tan ever on my face...
life is weird...
granny would have never knitted me this...
it's amazing how something like knitting can be turned into some sort of disturbing art form... like you are sitting there in front of the tv knitting this... what the f@#k are you watching on tv?
this is very texas chainsaw massacree actually... maybe ed geins mum knitted him these when he was a child... so she was to blame for what happened to him when he grew up...
check out the rest here...
creepy kojak
i guess this is telly savalas doing a bit of a william shatner... although this seems to have had the humour removed so all thats left is just plain weirdness... he's in love with a giant girl...
william shatner on Q tv
more Q tv stuff and this one is great... william shatner seems like a very cool guy...
you can get the transformed man here...
puttin on the ritz
for some weird reason i woke up this morning and this song was in my head... not sure why, but i have to say it's slightly creepy... slightly more creepier still is tacos website... please enter...
glover & malkovich on Q tv
not in the same interview i'm afraid but great anyways... crispin glover looks good with a bread!!!
LOST fans... this is gold!!!
jimmy kimmel did a wrap up show in the states after the fianl of LOST and this was on it... genius...
great costume
i was taking about a great movie the other week called zardoz where sean connery struts around in a futuristic world in some red leather undies... kinda like this guys halloween costume... awesome job, fulla...
no f@#kin' way... they were puppets all along?
this photo has single handedly destroys everything i ever believed in as a child... and they tell me they were all like this... not just the cast of sesame street but all the muppets aswell... and i'm guessing fraggle rock as well... not that i was as connected to the fraggles as i was kermit and the gang... the muppet movie soundtrack cassette tape got stuck in my dads car stereo because i played it so much... when we used to go out on sunday drives and 'movin' right along' was blasting on the tape deck and i always hoped i'd see that big fork in the road like in the movie...
but i can't believe they are not real... i just thought jim henson was the guy that discovered them and gave them their big break... but it seems that he had more of a hand in their success than i thought... literally... sheesh... i guess now you are gonna tell me santas not real and the easter bunny is not an actual bunny...
anyway, heres the muppets star wars episode... this will make me feel better...
this is magic
nice to see another rockstar out there with glasses... this could almost be me singing this aswell...
hugo sells weed to larry
i have only just started watching curb your enthusiasm recently and it's fucking great...
here's a scene where hurley from LOST (jorge garcia) sells some weed to larry david...
my latest brainwave...
... is to open an internet cafe and all the computers will be old skool 70's or 80's ones rebuilt with high speed internet... i think that would kinda rule...
i found it!!!!
i was wondering if this was somewhere out there on the internet... and i found it... it pays to not lose faith and just keep looking...
if any one photo has ever given me the creeps it's this one...
jim carrey
love him or hate him, you cannot deny that jim carrey can sing his ass off... he's a comic genius and like most great comic genius', you really see it come through in interviews... not all his movies are great, but that is not always because of him... there are a lot of factors in making a film funny and it's not just down to the main actor... but when he's one on one with an interviewer he proves how funny and totally bonkers he actually is... another one of those sad clowns, and well up there with those other great sad clowns, john cleese and peter sellers, in my book...
speaking of jim carrey, his movie eternal sunshine of the spotless mind was on over the weekend and i forgot how fucking good that movie is... the thought that you could, or would want to, erase somebody from your mind who you have loved and who has broken your heart is a pretty heavy concept... and is it, in fact, better to live with all the memories, both good and bad, than to not live with them at all... and then by removing those thoughts you are removing parts of yourself and would be in fact turning yourself into this empty shell who has never really felt pure true love and hearth break... now there's a thought as deep as the abyss...
baby barrack
naughty obama for smoking... i think he still does... i guess it's better than taking drugs though and i guess when you are under pressure at work you need something to calm you down...
i guess this photo just goes to show that this guy has never had a problem with being cool...
your balloon man
this bloke just asked to be my friend on youtube... he goes by the slightly unfortunate name of mr fudge... i'll be his friend though... even though i've only just managed to learn how to blow up a balloon and then tie it off so the air doesn't come out... a lobster might be a stretch for me right at this moment but if i keep practicing with mr fudge i reckon i'll be a big hit at the next party i go to... thanks mr fudge...
man vs wild
wilco loves bear grylls and i have to admit so do i... i mean, i tried to get him to watch an episode of macgyver and he was just not into it... and i can kind of understand that now... bear is macgyver times 1000 and he's the real thing... well, pretty real... more real than richard dean anderson was anyway... he's hardcore and he eats lots of crazy shit... so i'll give up on trying to convert wilco to macgyver...
here is bear on letterman answering some tough questions about how real the show is... i'd have to say though after seeing the wasp bite he gets, you could not argue that this guy is not just some reality show actor...
this is pretty funny too...
vegetable man
i don't know where the heck he finds them, but my buddy andrew has come up with what has to be a photo of the worlds healthiest superhero... vegetable man... kids will hate him... i mean he doesn't look like he does much... he just sits there... vegetating...
hey, actually that doesn't sound too bad... this guy is my kind of superhero... he is healthy and he just gets to just sit there... in his vegetative superhero-type state... i hope i can be just like vegetable man when i grow up...
some more bebe ray art
i am thinking again... and i am thinking that i would love to open a kids art gallery... these are some of bebe's drawings and i just put them on backgrounds... a two year olds art is just so pure and her only influences at this stage are maybe yo gabba gabba and her brother... flippin' amazing... i'd buy it...
shock horror... thom yorke can laugh
it must suck when you are famous for being miserable... and it's so small minded to think that anyone who can write killer sad songs is also a sad person in real life and is forever skulking around feeling depressed... i mean you just need to listen to that morrisey stuff i posted yesterday to hear that he's on funny bloke... and the truth is a person that writes sad songs most likely feels a lot better than a person who doesn't write sad songs... i know i feel happy when i listen to sad music... it doesn't make me feel worse... i saw radiohead play once and i was in a pretty bad place and it didn't make me feel worse... i walked out of that show 10 feet taller... maybe i even floated out of that show... anyways this is one of my favorite few seconds on youtube ever, proving that thom yorke's face won't crack if he smiles... or laughs even...
on my happy travels i also found this nice clear live solo version of 'true love waits' from july last year... great stuff...
cat power
i can't tell you in words how much i love chan marshall's voice... if i could choose any singing voice in the universe to have as my own it would be her's... it's so beautiful and it can cut you like a knife... appreciated best at the piano just by herself... i would say you are free is in my top 10 albums of all time... i once did a tour poster for her and i did it really quickly and i really wish i could have had another crack at it but i did get it signed and she wrote 'love from chan' on it... sigh...
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